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Shift your focus—Our boudoir story

Updated: Feb 23, 2020

When was the last time you did something for yourself? I mean, really did something for yourself. Not like buying that candy bar at the gas station because “treat yourself”. I’m talking about really treating yourself.

Yummy Treats!

For me, “treating myself” was mainly with food because I love food, I eat my feelings, and food sparks joy. After having two surgeries following a work accident in 2017, my weight was at an all time high. I weighed more than when I did when I was pregnant! With this came the depression, anxiety, and feeling sorry for myself. My best friend from college reached out to me and gave me the encouragement I needed to focus on my health. Laying in bed feeling sorry for myself wasn’t doing anything for me. With her support and encouragement, I was able to lose 40lbs and started to feel normal again.

Tragically, in 2018 she passed away in a car accident. That fucked me up and still fucks me up to this day. The spiral of depression came rearing its ugly head again. Jon was starting to become frustrated with how hard I was on myself. I had lost a serious amount of weight and still had this image of myself of how I was when I was borderline obese. He had finally had enough and said,

“I wish you could see yourself the way I see you”.

This hit me hard. Was I really that hard on myself? Well, yeah. I was. I avoided looking in the mirror, I had nothing positive to say about my body, I wore baggy clothing to hide anything I thought people would see as disgusting or would judge me for. I’m good at putting thoughts in other people’s head. I absolutely hated having my picture taken. I would run the other way any time a camera was near or there was mention of a selfie.

Jon was adamant about showing me that I was beautiful, not only on the inside, but on the outside. He took it upon himself and bought me some lingerie and told me to do my hair and makeup because we were doing a photoshoot. Now, if you know me at all, you know I am stubborn as hell. So, this took some convincing. The thoughts that were going through my head were enough to bring on a panic attack.

Why would I want photographic evidence of my flaws? All my stretch marks, loose skin, cellulite, etc.??

He promised me that it wasn’t as bad as I thought it was. I was able to put my insecurities aside and do a shoot.

The feeling you have when you see yourself in a different light is something that is truly unexplainable. It’s like a light bulb comes on for the first time and you can see. When I saw my images for the first time, I didn’t believe it was me. That’s what I look like?? It’s not at all what I had in my head. I hadn’t felt so confident in myself in so long that this feeling was very emotional.

I felt a wave of confidence and empowerment. This is what I want all women to experience.

Every woman deserves to feel this way because we are all beautiful no matter what our flaws are. We nitpick things about ourselves because they are different from someone else's. I believe social media has exacerbated this effect. The reactions we get from women when they see their images for the first time is such a beautiful and emotional experience. This is why we love boudoir and are so passionate about it.

When you see your images from the back of the camera during a session, you immediately say, “holy shit! It’s working!”

We are so hard on ourselves and if we are just able to let go for just a moment and trust in the process, we will be pleasantly surprised. Shift your focus.

I was able to shift my focus and see myself in a new light. This is where Shifted Focus Boudoir came to light.

I encourage you to really do something for yourself. Step out of your comfort zone just a tiny bit and open your mind. I encourage you to try a boudoir shoot. I know you won’t regret it.

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